


Together, Apart.

by danielaisreading



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Armin Arlert - Freeform, Erwin Smith - Freeform, Eventual Smut, F/M, Levi - Freeform, Levi Ackerman - Freeform, Levi x OC, NSFW, OC, Original Character(s), Pain, Rivals to Lovers, Sad Ending, Slow Burn, aot - Freeform, hange zoe - Freeform, im sorry, levi ackerman x oc - Freeform, levixreader - Freeform, mikasa ackerman - Freeform, porco galliard - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:42:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28970028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danielaisreading/pseuds/danielaisreading
Summary: Levi x OC-It's been 5 years since  Marlene Galliard joined the survey corps. Since then, Marlene steadily climbed up the ranks and earned her position as Captain. There, she forms a bond with everyone. Unfortunately, she has a mission and a big secret. She can't grow attached to the people. Will she go through with her mission or will her emotions get the better of her?
Comments: 5
Kudos: 15





	1. [0] introduction

**Author's Note:**

> I recommend listening to the song that is in the beginning of each chapter.  
> Also, sorry for any grammatical errors os misspelled words. English is not my first language. <3

~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~~

_"There is no such thing as bad people. We're all just people who sometimes do bad things"_

_"Just because someone hurts you doesn't mean you can simply stop loving them. It's not a person's actions that hurt the most. It's the love. If there was no love attached to the action, the pain would be a little easier to bear."_  
 _~~~~~~~~~~_ ꧁꧂ _~~~~~~~~~~_

**Marlene Galliard.**   
**(mar-LAY-na)**

**☽** **Nickname: Mar**   
**(only close friends call her Mar)**

******☽** **Light brown eyes**

**☽** **Shoulder length dark brown hair**

**☽** **5'5**

**☽** **Born on; October 31**

**☽** **Scorpio** **♏︎**

**☽** **24 years old**

ఌ **Noticeable features; has a scar under her right eye and one above her collar bone. Medium sized, faded, burn mark on her left forearm. (wears long sleeve shirts most of the time)**

ఌ **Tough minded, secretive, stubborn, assertive, forceful**

ఌ **Hates; Marley.**

~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~

 ** _I always put a song at the beginning of each chapter, I recommend listening to it before/while reading the chapter_**.

Sorry about any grammatical errors or mistakes, English is not my first language.  
  
  


Levi is younger in this AU. Levi is 29.

~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~

" ** _Together, Apart."_**  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_"I am Marlene Galliard."_ **


	2. [1] Freida

  
♪ Washing Machine Heart - Mitski

~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~~

chapter 1: Freida

"4 abnormal's up ahead!" Victor shouted

"HANJI'S GROUP GO TO THE LEFT" I motioned to my left side.

"ARLO'S GROUP GO TO THE RIGHT" I motioned to my right side.

"Will you be okay by yourself?" Hanji said

"Yes I will, now go!"

"Good luck Galliard" Hanji headed to the left side "MY GROUP FOLLOW ME! DON'T LOSE FORMATION" she shouted

Jozef and Freida stayed behind me

"Tch, I said to follow your groups!" I shouted

Jozef shook his head "We aren't leaving you alone Captain Galliard"

"We're staying right by your side Marlene!" Freida nodded along with Jozef.

"Be careful and if things get too complicated for you two please retreat to Hanji or Arlo's group." I raised my blade and pointed at either side of me.

"Okay! I'll see you soon Mar." Freida galloped ahead with her horse leaving me behind.

I stood on my horse, heading straight into a titan. I propelled myself with my odm gear and latched onto the titan's shoulder. I cut the titan's arm and reached it's nape, slicing through. The titan fell to the ground. I swung around through the trees trying to spot my horse.

As I jumped down and made a quick landing using my gear, I spotted a figure in the distance. I rolled on to my knees and stood up, patting the mud stained on my pants. As I approached the figure lying on the floor, I recognized the dark green cape they were wearing. The wings of freedom, another soldier, dead. As I flipped the body over to identify them, my heart dropped. I immediately recognized the red haired girl, it was Freida. Dead. Sudden anger and grief seeping through my body, I gritted my teeth, my shaky hands gripped on to my swords, and I looked straight ahead at the titan that had just killed one of my closest friends. I charged forward, cutting through it's ankles, making it fall to the ground. As the realization that Freida was dead processed through my mind, I did not hesitate to slice throughout the whole titans body, decapitating it. As the titan fell to the ground, so did I. I fell to my knees, and looked down at Freida's limp, dead body.

"Freida.." I reached my arm out to stroke her soft ginger hair.

A horse came charging towards me, someone mounted on top of it. That someone was Jozef. He took my right arm and quickly pulled me on to his horse.

"Captain! you can't be out in the open like this" He yelled

I stayed silent, and rested my head on Jozef's back, tears pooling my eyes.

Jozef could not quite understand why I was acting like this. The captain he knew, looked up to, and admired, would never act out like this. To Jozef, and all the other members of the survey corps, Captain Galliard rarely ever showed emotion. When I did show emotion, it was usually not the cheery or emotional type. Rather, it was angry, sarcastic, or simply not caring.

We got to our campsite where everyone was, except Freida. Hanji came running towards me and ran into my arms "Marlene! Are you ok?"

"I'm fine Hanji" I pulled down the hood of my cape

"Is everyone here yet?" Erwin called out to the whole group.

"Where is Freida?" Someone muttered.

Her name being said for the first time since her death made my breath hitch. I clenched my fist and turned to Jozef,

"You son of a bitch" I muttered.

"What?" Jozef met my gaze.

Without warning, I tackled him to the ground and raised my arm, threatening to punch him.

"CAPTAIN!?" someone shouted as Hanji ran towards me and tried to pull me off of Jozef.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH" I yelled at Jozef, Hanji pulled my arm back just as I let go, missing his face by a centimeter.

"WHAT DID I DO?" he yelled back

I lifted my fist off the ground, stood up, and turned back to face the other soldiers, their eyes trained onto me.

"I told everyone to split into their groups" I fought the urge to let emotion take control of my body.

"What?" Jozef said

"I TOLD EVERYONE TO SPLIT UP AND YOU CONVINCED FREIDA TO STAY WITH ME." I snapped my head back to Jozef's direction, looking straight into his light green eyes.

I started breathing heavily, reaching for my blade as I walked up to him.

"BECAUSE OF YOU FREIDA IS DEAD" I yelled

"Freida is dead?" Jozef looked at me, his eyes widened.

Just then, a boot came into contact with my face, knocking me to the ground.

"Stop causing such a problem Marlene." Levi scolded.

"Shut your fucking mouth Levi. You have no idea what it feels like." I was definitely on the verge of breaking.

His eyes darkened. He clenched his jaw at my words. Levi grabbed my hair and dragged me deeper into the woods, as the other soldiers just stared. Once we were out of sight, he threw me against a tree, I winced in pain as my back hit the hard, rugged, tree trunk.

"You think I don't fucking know what it feels like to lose someone?" He shouted

"I don't think you do." I said

He walked towards me and kicked me in the stomach, I coughed up small amounts of blood. "You have only been here for 5 years Marlene. 5 fucking years." He leaned down and pulled me up by my shirt's collar. "That is absolutely NOTHING compared to all the people I have lost here. Unlike you though, I do not cause a scene. They're dead. We can't bring them back to life so shut the fuck up and get your shit together" He threw me back on to the floor.

"How can you be so heartless Levi?" I looked up at him, wiping blood from the corner of my mouth.

He glanced at me as he turned around and walked back to the campsite.

As soon as Levi was out of sight, the small wound on my forehead began healing, as my blood began evaporating.

_I'm growing too attached to these people._

_...Reiner, I don't think I can do this. I have to do it though, for Marcel and Porco._

I hid any evidence of my wounds healing and walked back to the campsite, faking a limp. I walked back to the circle of people gathered around the campfire, and approached Jozef.

"Jozef." I placed my hand on his shoulder as he looked back at me. "I'm so sorry."

Jozef's eyes softened and he smiled at me, "It's okay Captain. I'm so sorry about Freida."

I let go of his shoulder and nodded, as I took a seat next to Hanji.

"You are so feisty even though you're so small" Hange snorted

"Hanji, i'm not that small" I sighed

"Yes you are Mar! I wouldn't be surprised if you are shorter than Levi."

"No. Everyone is taller than Levi." I rolled my eyes playfully at her

"What was that four-eyes?" Levi glared at Hanji

"Go away Levi" Hanji waved him off. A small smirk creeped on to her face. She pulled me up and dragged me over to Levi. She pushed me next to him and examined our height.

She burst into a fit of laughter, "You are right Mar!" she snorted "You're taller than the midget!"

Levi slapped the back of her head.

"Obviously," I nodded

"Galliard." Erwin walked up behind me.

"Yes?"

"Follow me"

My heart sank, did he see me?

I walked to the outskirts of the forest with Erwin

"Are you okay working with Jozef tomorrow?"

Oh, he didn't see.

"Yes, I'm okay. I overreacted"

"Good" Erwin nodded

"Is that all?" I said awkwardly 

he nodded and turned back to the campsite.

"Listen up everybody" Erwin called out

"Since we lost 10 soldiers today, I am teaming you up with others." He grabbed a list of names

"Captain Galliard is gonna be teamed up with Jozef, and Hanji's squad"

Erwin turned to Levi and his group, "Levi, for this, i'm gonna separate the Levi squad"

Levi glared at Erwin, "ok."

"Okay so, Capt. Galliard is in charge of Jozef, Hanji, her squad, Eld, and finally, Petra"

I nodded.

"Levi is gonna be with the rest of his squad and Arlo's squad." He closed the list of names

"Does everyone understand?"

"Yes" everyone said in unison

"Okay then. Everyone rest up, tomorrow is the last day of our expedition."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hanji" I tapped her shoulder

"Hanji" I shook her slightly

"HANJI" I slapped her head and shook her violently

"WHAT" she yelled back

"It's morning we need to get going" i responded

We left the tent and prepared the horses.

"Where's my cape" I scanned the area looking for the green cape.

"Here" Someone handed me a cape "You left it on the floor"

I turned around to see Levi holding my cape. I took it from him "Thank you Levi"

He walked up next to me "Don't pull some stupid shit today" he whispered, making my whole body shudder.

"Yes sir" I mimicked his tone sarcastically.

"Tch" He walked away

I pulled my cape over my shoulders.

"Hey captain"

"Petra you don't need to be so formal" I looked at her

"But you are my superior I need to address you properly" She smiled

"Petra, we're friends. My friends don't call me captain" I laughed

"Okay Okay" she laughed again "I hope everyone returns to wall Rose" she turned to the campsite

"We will, don't worry." I put my hand on her shoulder.

"You know," she turned to me. "Me and Oluo want to get married when we come back" She showed me a small silver ring on her left hand.

"Petra!" I said "Congratulations!" I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tightly.

"Thank you" She smiled

"Oi brats get over here" Levi called out

"Levi stop calling me a brat we're almost the same age"

"Tch"

"Tch" I mimicked his hand movements. Probably my favorite thing to do is being sarcastic and mocking this short little man.

He ignored me.

Erwin sat around all of us, "we are changing plans. We are going back immediately to wall Rose"

"What. Why?" I asked

"It's too dangerous to keep pursuing this expedition"

Everyone agreed

"So all the work we did will go down the drain?" I asked "All the lives lost would have been for nothing? Freida's death would have been in vain?!" I raised my voice at Erwin, something I don't usually do.

"Hey calm down Marlene" Levi put his hand on my shoulder

"Erwin, we need to keep going with the expedition." Levi said

"We can't let those people die in vain" I said

"But what about us?! They're already dead we don't want to die too" Someone spoke up

"If you die, and we are successful with the expedition, your life was a step forward in saving humanity" I replied.

Oh. I'm starting to think the same way as these island devils.

"I agree with captain Galliard and captain Levi" Petra stood up

"Petra!" Oluo cried out.

"We can't let the people who died die in vain Oluo."

"Me and my group are with them" Arlo said

"No we're not! Arlo!" his squad mates shouted

"Yes you are. We are doing this" Arlo glared daggers into his teammates

"We agree with Marlene and Levi" Hanji walked over to us

Erwin stared at us, shocked. "Okay then. We continue the expedition" He sighed

"Gather the horses and prepare to begin!" I yelled

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I rode my horse through the thick woods, Petra and Hanji to my sides

"Don't lose formation!" I yelled

"Captain I see an abnormal" Petra pointed at a titan

"6 meter titan" Hange said

"Okay stay here. I got it" I stood up on my horse and used my 3dm gear to latch onto a nearby tree trunk. I swung through the trees and finally saw an opening on the titan. I released my gear and flew straight into the nape, slicing it all off. I returned to my horse and landed perfectly on it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

green flares were shot up into the sky.

I grabbed my flare gun and shot one too.

"Everyone! We are heading back to wall Rose" I yelled

The whole time, we stayed in formation and approached Wall Rose.

"I see the wall!" Hanji stated

Suddenly, the floor started rumbling.

"SHIT" Jozef yelled "THERE'S A TITAN BEHIND US"

"Just keep going straight we'll make it!" I shouted

Everyone followed my orders and continued straight. I had other plans in mind though. I fell behind and headed towards the titan

"MARLENE WHAT THE HELL COME BACK" Hanji yelled

"YOU'RE IN CHARGE HANJI IM GONNA KILL THIS BASTARD!"

I latched onto the titan's thigh. I used my blades to slice an ankle off. Just as I was about to slice the second ankle off, the titan grabbed onto the hook that was latched on its thigh.

"Shit" I yelled

I started falling to the ground. My eyes widened, as I faced the ground that inched closer to my face by the second.

I closed my eyes waiting for my inevitable death.

Suddenly, I felt two hands grab my waist and pull me out of the way. I looked up at whoever saved me. It was none other than the other captain himself, Levi.

"I told you not to pull stupid shit like that" He said

"Well I'm not dead" I shrugged

"You would have been if I didn't save you"

Levi used his odm gear to get on top of the wall. The moment we reached wall Rose he let go of me.

"We have to go to headquarters" I said

"Let's just sit here and rest for a moment"

"Is captain Levi tired?" I raised my eyebrow and smirked

"Yes, I'm tired, do you know how fast I had to move to get to you in time?"

"You could have just let me die" I laid down on the concrete

Levi stayed quiet.

"Come on then we need to go to headquarters" He said

"Hey, I thought you said we should rest" I looked up at him

"I changed my mind"

"No no, I want to rest now" I closed my eyes

Levi groaned, grabbed my hair, and forcibly pulled me up.

"Levi why are you always dragging me by my hair?" I tried to slap his hand away from my head.

"Shut up and let's go to" Levi answered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_word count: 2467_


	3. [2] Fever

♪ Walk you home - Sir Chloe

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 2: Fever

Me and Levi walked through the door. All the scouts were in the cafeteria eating after an exhausting mission.

"IT'S THE CAPTAINS!" someone yelled. Everyone turned to the door and saw the two captains standing in the doorway.

"Marlene." hanji walked up to me

"Hey Ha-"

**SMACK**

Hanji just slapped me.

"What the fuck was that?" she looked at me "You made me think you died!"

"Well, I'm not dead so that's good." I crossed my arms

"Yea thanks to me" Levi mumbled

We both looked at each other, "Tch," at the same time

"Marlene!" Petra walked up to me and hugged me, "I'm so glad you're okay"

"me too" I smiled

"Go clean yourself up and meet me at the cafeteria" Hanji slapped my back and walked off

"Okay."

I walked through the cold hallway, hearing the soft echo of my footsteps, and entered my office. Once I entered, I immediately ripped off my dark green cape, and threw the green fabric on to the floor. I walked over to my desk and to my horror, I found huge stacks of paperwork neatly placed on my desk. Great, I come back and in less than 24 hours i have to fill all of THIS out? Fuck. I ignored all the paperwork and turned to my bedroom, undressing myself and hurrying into the bath.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Mar!" Hanji waved

"Hey" I walked over to the table.

"Where's Levi?" Hanji asked

I looked around, "I don't know"

"Hmm okay come over here" She patted on the seat next to her as I sat down.

"We thought you died" Arlo said

"I know you did" I laughed

"That's not something to laugh about Marlene" Petra frowned

"Guys, guys, it's okay! I'm fine! Levi saved my ass so I am here eating with you guys now. Stop worrying" I said

I picked up my spoon and shoveled a spoonful of porridge into my mouth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Levi hasn't come out of his office" Petra said

"I mean, Levi IS a social reject so-" I slapped Hanji's head before she could finish her sentence.

"Yea that's pretty strange. At this time Levi would be out and about making sure everyone is cleaning" Jozef shuddered

"I'll go check on him" I responded as I picked up my food tray

"okay"

I exited the cafeteria and walked through the halls. I turned and faced Levi's office.

**knock**

"Levi, can I come in?"

no response.

**knock**

"Levi?"

again, no response.

"That's it. I'm coming in. You better not be doing some weird shit." I yelled as I opened the door

I walked into his neat and clean office. Not a single spec of dust or dirt in sight, very different compared to my office.

His office is empty. Where the hell is he?

I peeked through the door and into his bedroom. He was sitting on the edge of his bed, his back facing me.

"Levi?" I said

I walked over and kneeled next to him. He looked away, avoiding my eyes.

"Levi look at me." I glared at him

"no."

"Levi. Look at me!" I grabbed his chin and forced him to look at me. His dark grey eyes gave me a cold stare. That's when I noticed.

"holy shit you're burning up" I let go of his chin and placed my hand on his forehead.

"No, i'm fine" Levi coughed

"God dammit Levi stop acting like you're okay" I hissed as I pushed him down onto his bed.

I left his room and rushed to the cafeteria and into the kitchen. I grabbed a bowl and filled it with water. I spotted a rag. I picked it up and ripped it in half.

"Hey Mar!" Hanji said, "Wait, what are you doing?"

I sighed as I drenched the ripped rag into the bowl of water "He has a fever and he didn't tell anyone"

"Oh, really?" Hanji wondered "Well I thought he wasn't coming out because he was a social reject, I didn't think it was because-"

"Hanji" I turned to her

"Yes?" she raised her eyebrow

I squeezed the water out of one of the rags, making it cold and damp.

I sighed, "Hanji I'm gonna go take care of Levi"

"Oh okay" She opened at the kitchen door and pointed out.

"Can you heat up some porridge?" I asked Hanji as I exited the kitchen.

"Sure" she shrugged

"Thanks." I responded and made my way back to Levi's bedroom.

I went back inside to find Levi laying down with his eyes closed. Slowly, I made my way to Levi and pulled out a chair from the corner. I sat myself next to him and reached for the damp rag. I placed the cold rag on his forehead, shivering at the sudden touch. My fingers traced down to the collar of his shirt, and I slowly started unbuttoning his shirt.

"What are you doing?" Levi opened his eyes

"I need to cool you down." I responded

"I told you I'm fine" he sat up

"No you aren't shut the fuck up" I ordered

Levi stayed quiet and laid back down as I finished unbuttoning his shirt. I dunked my other rag into the bowl of water. As the piece of cloth slowly succumbed to the water, I looked back up at Levi,

"When did you start getting sick?" I asked

He stayed quiet.

"Levi stop ignoring me. Talk to me." I took the rag out and put it on his chest.

"I started feeling sick since we were in the woods"

"Oh, since you beat the shit out of me?" I dragged the cloth over his abs and up to his neck.

"Yea" he responded

"You have got to stop distancing yourself from others Levi" I traced over his biceps, and down his forearms, leaving a wet trail.

"It's hard" he mumbled

"What?" I dunked the cloth back into the bowl

"It's hard, because.. they all die in the end. It's better if I'm not close to them.

My eyes softened, in a way he's right. It hurts less if you aren't close to the person that died. Even so, his way of thinking made me feel an utmost feeling of melancholy. This feeling, that makes my heart drop, it almost makes me feel sorrowful for the man before me. The man who is currently laying down, with a burning fever, but refused to tell anyone, because he prefers to be apart from everyone.

"Levi, I understand, but you are sick. Even if you don't want to interact with people you are sick. You have to tell SOMEONE"

"You found me." His eyes met mine

"I'm glad I went looking for you." I returned his gaze.

I placed the bowl and the rag on his nightstand.

"I'll go get my paperwork, Hanji will bring you some porridge soon." I stood up from my chair

"Just stay in your office, I'm fine" He waved me off

"No." I left his bedroom and hurried back to my office. I grabbed a stack of folders and papers and took a pen that was laying on my desk.

"Guess who's back!" I smiled at Levi and placed my paper work on the floor

"At least go do that in my office, you are gonna be a nuisance here." he looked down at my paperwork

I gritted my teeth and stood back up, "Fine, Mr. fucking attitude." I sat down on his desk and started filling out documents, the slight scratching of the pen distracting my thoughts about the man that was currently sleeping in the room next door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I sat up and looked at the clock, it's been 2 hours, and I still have so much fucking paperwork to get rid of. I placed 3 folders in Levi's pile of paperwork, hopefully he won't notice. I stood up from his chair and carefully walked to the door of his bedroom. I peeked into his room, you know what I saw? The 5'2 midget lay wide awake on his fucking bed.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." I walked in and crossed my arms

"What?"

"You were supposed to be sleeping dumbass!"

Levi blinked at me "I'm not tired"

I let out a big groan and sat back on the chair. My hand found it's way back to Levi's face and I placed my hand on his forehead.

"It's finally down" I smiled

"Okay"

"Now, go to sleep"

"No"

"You don't sleep a lot Levi you need to get some rest" I furrowed my brows.

"I'm staying here until you fall asleep." I took out my pen and a couple of folders and began filling out my paperwork.

Levi sighed.

——-

I look back up, half expecting for Levi to be staring at me. To my surprise though, he was asleep. His usually angry or annoyed facial expressions were now soft and relaxed. His dark, black, raven hair rested perfectly on his forehead. He looked.. peaceful. I have never seen him look this calm. It was comforting. I couldn't help but admire what an attractive facial structure Levi had. I had never paid any attention to this before, but today is different. I smiled at his sleeping figure before looking back down and continuing my paperwork.

The door creaked open

"Hey Mar!" Hanji said

"Shh" I signaled to Levi who was still sound asleep.

Hanji's mouth flew open, "He's asleep?" she whispered.

I nodded

"Holy shit Marlene what type of drug did you give him?" She stood there, with a perplexed look.

I let out a small laugh "I didn't do anything"

she placed the bowl of porridge next to his nightstand.

"I guess he's gonna have to eat tomorrow. I don't want to wake him up." The scratching of my pen stopped.

"I'm sure he'll stay asleep, you should go rest Mar, it's your first day back" Hanji frowned

I, like Levi, also had sleeping problems and irregular sleeping patterns. I guess the reason I practically begged Levi to sleep is because I know how hard it is to work without any energy. Honestly, I don't know how Levi goes so long without any sleep, and still be a better captain and soldier than me. However, before I could hesitate or refuse, Hanji pulled my ear, and dragged me out of Levi's room.

"I don't care what you have to say Y/N you need to go to sleep too. Stop neglecting yourself and putting others before you." She hissed

"Okay, okay, I will go to sleep Hanji." I shuddered. Hanji is terrifying sometimes.

As I turned around, I said, "Also, I know you're angry. Please don't kick any poor tables or chairs today though."

"Shut the fuck up" Hanji said

"Let me just say goodnight" I walked past her and once again, entered Levi's room.

I peeked through the door, and looked at Levi, still asleep.

"Good night Levi" I whispered before shutting the door closed.

_Word count 1864_


	4. Cadets

♪ Sleep Thru Ur Alarms - Lontalious

~~~~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 3: Cadets

"Marlene." Erwin called out as I stepped into his office

"What's wrong" I walked over to his desk

Erwin placed his hands on his desk and looked up, "Nothing. Today we are having a group of cadets join us"

"Oh?" I leaned against the wall with my arms crossed.

"Yea, they're gonna be joining us in headquarters today." He ran his hands through his slick blonde hair.

"So, why did you call me to your office?"

"Because, I want you to escort them to their rooms and show them around the castle."

"Why me?"

"It's only natural for a squad captain to introduce the newbies to the area. Levi isn't the friendliest face either.."

"I'll do it"

"One of the cadet's is..special, to say the least" Erwin pulled out a list. "There are 6 people joining us, their names are; Armin Arlert, Jean Kirstein, Connie Springer, Sasha Braus, Mikasa Ackerman, and.. Eren Yeager."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The cadet's are here!" someone shouted

I walked up to the group of people, they seemed extremely young. 15 years old maybe, did they recruit people this young?

"Hello everyone" I waved at the new scouts, a small smile on my face. "I am captain Marlene Galliard. I'll be showing you to your rooms and introducing you to the new atmosphere"

"Yes Captain Galliard!" All of them saluted

"First, I want to get familiar with your faces, tell me your names."

"I'm Armin Arlert" A boy with blue eyes and blond hair smiled.

"I'm Mikasa Ackerman." A black haired girl wearing a bright red scarf looked at me.

"I'm Jean Kirstein" a sandy haired guy with a cocky smile smirked at me.

"I'm Connie Springer" A short, (shorter than Levi) boy with a buzzed haircut responded

"I'm Sasha Braus" A brown haired girl grinned

"I'm Eren Yeager" A brown haired boy with bright green eyes smiled at me.

I nodded, trying to take in all the information.

I began, "This is Captain Levi Ackerman, he-"

"You brats will address me as Captain Levi. You will ALL participate in chores, and-"

"Levi is a little on the grumpy side" I scratched the back of my neck, "Thank you for your time Levi, you are excused."

"Tch" Levi walked away

"Anyways, this is squad leader, Hanji Zoe"

"Hey everyone! I'm Hanji, and I am a squad leader. I hope we can get along" She smiled

"You can meet everyone else in your own time. I'm sure you already met our commander, Erwin. If you follow me I will escort you to your rooms."

My eyes glanced around the group of kids, I don't know why, but I could sense that Mikasa and Eren were together.Hard to explain, but the way they acted around one another was different. I turned my back towards them and started walking through the hallway.

I turned to a door and looked around, facing the group of teens once again.

"This room is for..Jean and Connie" I pointed at the door

I walked to the room next door, and checked my list once again. "This room is for Armin and Eren"

I pointed to the last door in the corner, "And that room over there is for Mikasa and Sasha."

I looked back at them, my eyes landed on Eren and Mikasa. "Now," I sighed "Let me make one thing clear. I do not give 2 flying shits about anything that happens inside these rooms. If you really want to do something though," I knocked against the wall, "These walls are thin so please be thoughtful of other people and try not to be so loud" I smiled at Mikasa who looked unfazed, and Eren, whose face turned a bright shade of red.

"We won't do anything captain!" Eren shouted

"Mhm" I raised my eyebrows

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I sat down as usual with Hanji, Arlo, and Moblit in the cafeteria.

"Did you see the new cadet's Moblit?" Hanji asked

"I did" He looked back and stared at the new group of kids

"I can't believe one of them is a titan!" Hanji practically started drooling

I choked on my soup "A what?"

"You didn't know? The Eren Yeager kid can turn into a titan its so exciting isnt it?"

My heart sank. This kid has a titan? It's him. The founder.

"Oh really?" I answered, pretending to be interested, not pretending, I _was_ interested

"Yea we transferred him here so he's close to Levi and Erwin"

I glanced at the teal eyed boy, a small frown on my face. Do I... do this? I can't forget the reason why I'm here.

"hmm" I wondered

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Eren" I calmly approached him

"Good morning captain!" Eren saluted

"So, how are you adjusting to the new place?"

"I'm doing great, thank you for asking"

I crossed my arms and looked at him, "Eren,"

"Yes.?" he raised his eyebrow

I never thought that out of all people, a 15 year old kid would be the one with the founder. "Tell me about your titan abilities, I'm really interested." I smiled.

"Of course!" The brunette boy started talking about what he's learned with Hanji and what he knows so far. A couple of mistakes here and there, a couple of fake articles of information, but at least he has an idea of what it is to be a titan shifter. This sweet 15 year old boy, with many, many years ahead of him. Now cut short, and cursed for his whole life. The world truly is a cruel and shitty world. I never asked to become one of these people. The simple act of becoming one was repulsing. However, I signed up for this shit because of Marcel and Porco. I couldn't bare the fact that my two little brothers were signing up for a suicide wish. Instead, I did it myself. I trained, and trained, to become the best warrior there is. Just to save the fucking lives of my two only brothers. Do I regret it? No. Unfortunately, my life was taken. Now, in 6 years, my inevitable perishing will happen, and I will only live on as a forgotten soul. A "brave'' little girl who was nothing more than a guinea pig that sacrificed her life for the great country of Marley.

To exterminate those Island devils.

Fuck this shit.

 ** _Fuck Marley_**.

"Captain Galliard?" A familiar voice snapped me out of my trance.

I looked back at the boy, curiously staring at me.

"Sorry" I laughed it off and rubbed the back of my head

"That was very interesting Eren! Whenever you learn more information don't be afraid to share it with me." I gave him a weak smile

"I'll keep that in mind, thank you captain." He saluted quickly before running off to the cafeteria.

I walked through the cold hallway and made my way to my office. Before I could enter, a black haired girl with a scarf stepped forward.

"What are you doing with Eren?" She asked me

"What?"

"I said what I said, why are you always following him?" Mikasa asked

This girl is gonna get on my nerves.

"Before you make any assumptions, I am a 24 year old woman, basically an oldie. I'm not interested in your little boyfriend, I'm 8 years older than him. Calm the fuck down."

Mikasa stared at me, mumbling something before walking off.

"What a bitch" I whispered

As I opened my office door, I felt someone push me into my office

"What the fuck?" I said

"Shut up." A familiar voice said

"What are you doing here Levi?" I got back on my feet as Levi closed my office door. He walked over to me and from under his arm, he shoved 3 crème colored folders into my chest.

"I-"

"you thought I wouldn't notice?" Levi scoffed

I thought for a moment and placed my fingers on my chin, "..No..."

"You're an idiot." He walked around my office and looked around.

"This office is disgusting" He ran his hands through my bookshelf, a thin layer of cinder colored dust coated his fingers.

"Thanks Levi I really appreciate it" A huge grin seeped into my face as I sat down onto my leather chair. I stayed quiet as the short male paced around my office, examining every little detail. From the books that rested unopened and laid quietly on my maroon bookshelf, to the thin layer of dust covering most of my hardwood floor. It was quite comforting watching him like this.

"So, why are you here?" I meekly asked as I placed my legs up onto my desk.

"Hm? Oh. I was here to give you your folders that you didn't want to fill out."

"..Then why are you still here?" I responded

Levi stopped, and looked at me. "I.. don't know." He crossed his arms and looked at me

"One day I'll clean this office. It's horrendous." He looked around with a disgusted look on his face.

"Okay, goodbye then" I pointed at my door

As Levi twisted the door knob and began exiting my office, he turned to me.

"I know why I was here now."

"Why?"

"Because I wanted to spend a little bit of time with you." He closed the door and left me alone in my office, my mouth hanging agape.

"Like hell you were." I placed the folders onto my desk

"Such a weirdo captain." I shook my head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**_word count 1605_ **


	5. [4] Shifters

♪ Murders - Miracle Musical

~~~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~~~

chapter 4: Shifters

I opened my office door and quietly hurried out. The familiar echo of my footsteps rang throughout the chilly stone hallway. I entered the cafeteria, put on my dark green cape, and adjusted the thick leather straps.

"Marlene?" A voice rang throughout my ears.

I turned around, and to my surprise, it was Hanji. "Hey.. Hanji" I awkwardly smiled.

"Where are you going? It's really early."

"I'm uh, just going out to walk around the city. I need a breath of fresh air." I came up with an excuse as to why I was leaving so early in the morning.

"Oh, you want me to come with?"

I laughed softly

She furrowed her eyebrows. Oh. She wasn't joking.  
"Oh! no no, it's okay! I just want to spend some time alone." I rubbed the back of my neck awkwardly.

"Hmm, okay. Please come back before our meeting though. It's an important one."

"Got it" I kissed her cheek and quickly exited headquarters.

I walked through the somewhat busy street. That's unusual, it's very early and yet, crowds of people are gathering around the city walkways. I turned right, towards an alleyway and into the buildings. I faced a worn out, maroon door , with a rusted, golden door knob. My hand reached up the door. Knocked twice, pause. Knocked once, pause. Knocked twice again. I heard shuffling from behind the door

**Click**

I pushed on the door as it slowly creaked open, and walked past the narrow hallway and to the empty living room.

"We've been waiting for you, Marlene"

"I know you were, Reiner."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Me and Reiner just joined the survey corps, how the hell did you manage to become captain?" Bertholdt frowned a little bit.

"You lazy asses waited to join though. I wasn't even part of the Shiganshina breaching. I got in as soon as we arrived." I shrugged, "Also, why did Annie join the military police?"

"That's why I called the meeting" Reiner scoffed

"Okay, smartass, I didn't even notice you sent a signal until last night" I snapped

"So, will Reiner explain the plan, or do I have to explain it?" Annie slid down the wall and situated herself on the floor, hugging her knees.

"I don't care just hurry up" I sat across from her and sighed

"Okay, next scouting expedition, the Female is gonna get involved." Reiner crossed his arms

My eyes widened and I looked up at him, "What?"

"We also want you to use the Jaw."

"What?" I looked at Annie and Bertholdt

"You heard me."

"Stop bullshitting me. No way in hell I'm transforming." I narrowed my eyes

"Why are you so difficult Marlene" Reiner gritted his teeth "We have to do this, why the fuck are you a warrior if you keep refusing to turn into the jaw?! You have not transformed once since we got here" He raised his voice.

"Hold on, hold on," I stopped "If you explain the plan, I will consider it"

"God dammit it Marlene" he banged the wall with his fist, making me jolt back.

"Hey, calm down Reiner," Bertholdt looked at him worriedly.

Reiner exhaled slowly, and turned to look at me. Once his eyes met mine, his gaze softened for a couple of seconds. He knows how much I hate the warrior program, and Marley.

Me and Reiner...have a complicated relationship.

"We located the founder, his name is Eren Yeager." Reiner spoke, "Me and Bertholdt tried to be stationed in the same headquarters as him. Unfortunately, we were sent different ways"

I snorted out a small laugh, "Oh, Eren? He's one of the cadets that joined my headquarters the other day."

"What?!" Annie gasped

I looked between each of their glances, "why is that so weird?"

"It's not. We just didn't know he was in your headquarters." Bertholdt reassured me

"The reason Annie joined the military police, is because she's going to transform, and take Eren. She wont be suspected either way, since she is in wall Sina." Reiner explained "Me and Bertholdt have copies of the squad formations being used in this expedition."

"Wait, what the fuck?" I walked up to Reiner and took the worn brown paper out of his hands. I scanned the formations quickly

"How did you get this?" I waved the piece of paper in front of his face

"We took it from someone's office"

"Erwin hasn't talked to me and Levi about it yet though" I mumbled. Oh, the meeting.

"That's not important." Reiner pointed to a formation towards the middle of the map "This is the Levi squad. Eren Yeager is gonna be with the Levi squad."

"How do you know?" I asked

"Because. Captain Levi is known as 'humanities strongest' and his group is in the safest area."

"What is Annie gonna do?"

"She's gonna transform into the female, wipe out the Levi squad, and kidnap Eren. After we do this we can go back to Marley" Reiner folded the worn out paper and put it back in his pocket

My heart sank. I felt conflicted. Reiner was so vindictive, it made me sick.

"I.."

"I know you aren't gonna use the jaw" He looked me

"You're right. My reasoning is justified too. I will not willingly kill my friends." I shook my head

"Marlene.." He placed his hand on my shoulder. I relaxed at the familiar touch,  
"These aren't people Marlene... they're devils. You know why we are here"

Those 11 words snapped me back to reality, pushing his arm away,

"Don't fucking touch me" I mumbled

Annie and Bertholdt looked at each other, and stood up. "We'll leave you two alone." They said in Unison.

"Marlene" Reiner grabbed my hand and looked at me.

"I said don't fucking touch me!" I moved my hand out of the way and took a step back, the distance between me and Reiner becoming more apparent.

"They aren't devils Reiner, they are normal fucking people like you and I. Marley, your **_mother_** brainwashed the shit out of you. You are too blind to see how much bullshit Marley spreads and how fucked up our country is. You are naïve." Reiner flinched at my sudden insult.

"It-"

"I don't want to hear it. You out of all people should know how I feel."

"Mar, wait.."

"Don't call me that."

I pushed him out of the way, "Get over us. That was 6 years ago. I have moved on, I suggest you do the same. You are the fucking worst." I readjusted my cape and walked out of the room.

"Marlene, please..." his arm reached out to me as I walked out the narrow hallway and left the building.

Annie and Betholdt were nowhere to be seen, I guess they already left. I walked out of the alleyway and into the now, busier street. How long was our meeting? I looked through all the food stalls, noticing the little kids giggling, laughing, and having fun. I wish it was like that. The thought about how absurd, cruel, and shitty my childhood was, made my heart sink. I endured, and raised my two younger brothers to have a better life than I ever could. Hopefully I succeeded. It's been 6 years since I've seen them, and I hope, no. I _know_ they are okay.  
I looked down at the ground watching my foot skip and avoid the cracks and lines in the concrete.

***bump***

I jolted back right as I made contact with something.. or someone.

"Shit- Oh uh, sorry I wasn-" I looked up at the familiar 5'3 man standing in front of me, a stern look in his eyes

"Levi? What are you doing here?"

"Four eyes wanted me to come find you."

"Oh, the meeting. I forgot" I laughed softly.

"I'm not gonna waste any more time. Follow me" Levi turned around and started walking, with no intention of waiting.

I trailed behind Levi, and followed him back to headquarters. The heavy wooden doors swung open.

"Four eyes, Marlene is here" Levi shouted

"Oh great! Let's hurry to the conference room, Erwin is already waiting"

Hanji seemed giddy, I wonder why. She grabbed my hand and pulled me through the stairs and down the hallway.

**_This is the second meeting in a day, and one of them is an enemy meeting._ **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
1424 words


	6. [5] Reiner

♪ A Teenagers Romance- Ricky Nelson

~~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~

_When_ **_(*)_ ** _appears play "I love you" by Billie Eilish._

chapter 5: Reiner  
  
  


I followed closely behind Reiner, our hands linked together. He led me through the busy streets of Liberio and to the entrance of his home.

"Mom" Reiner called out . I heard shuffling coming from upstairs as small pit pats rushed down the stairs.

"You're home! you brought Marlene too!" Reiner's mother smiled at me as she pinched my cheeks lightly, "How is my daughter in law doing?"

"Mom, she's not your daughter in law" Reiner chuckled.

"You two make such a lovely couple, I love to have Marlene as my daughter in law"

"I love to have you as a mother in law, Mrs. Braun" I smiled at her

"Your aunt dropped Gabi off here for a little while, so I'm babysitting her."

"Can I see Gabi? I haven't seen her in so long." I looked at Reiner and then back at Mrs. Braun

"Sure thing! Follow me" She signaled me and Reiner to climb up the stairs with her. As we entered the small living area, Reiner sat down on the sofa and patted the spot next to him. I took a seat next to him and waited anxiously as Mrs. Braun brought in a small baby wrapped in a blanket.

"She's gotten so big!" I smiled as I saw the little human sound asleep inside the caramel colored blanket.

"Yes she turned 1 last week." Mrs. Braun cooed at the young girl slightly before gently placing her into my arms.

The girl, which I thought was asleep at the time, opened her bright brown eyes, and gave me a toothy grin with the only tooth she had. I ran my hands through her short brown hair that was in the way and reached down to her with my hand. Gabi's tiny, chubby, baby arm reached up to my hand and she hooked her tiny hand on to my pinky finger.

"You really have a way with kids Marlene. You will be a great mother one day." Mrs. Braun once again smiled at me.

"She will" Reiner wrapped his arm around my waist and peeked over my shoulder staring down at his younger cousin.

"She's so cute right?" I looked up at Reiner and smiled

"Mhm" He reached his hand down to Gabi and stroked her hair slightly, Gabi giggling at the sudden attention.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Mar!" A voice called out to me

"Reiner?" I looked through the distance and saw familiar blond boy running towards me, holding up a red cloth.

"I got it!" He laughed as he waved the red Eldian arm band. Oh my god. He got the armor.

"You got the armor?!" I shouted

"Yes! We're both shifters now" Reiner ran up to me, picked me up, and twirled me around a couple of times.

"We're both shifters now" I smiled at him. Without thinking, Reiner pulled me into his chest and placed a soft kiss on my lips, followed by small pecks all over my face.

"Reiner stop, we're in public" I buried my head into his chest, avoiding eye contact.

"I just want to celebrate that not just me, but my girlfriend is an honorary Marleyan and one of the best warriors." He squeezed my shoulders and let go of me.

"Okay okay, we can celebrate. Let's just stop by my house first though, Marcel and Porco don't know yet."

"Whatever you say" He swung his arm around my shoulder and followed me to my home.

"Marcel look, Marlene is here!" A small blond boy ran up to me and Reiner

"Porco!" I leaned down and hugged my younger brother. In the corner of my eye, I saw another, this time brunette boy, approach me.

"Lene." Marcel smiled brightly at me as I stood back up

"Hey boys how are you guys" I grinned at them

"We are good, how about you?"

"Well.." I looked at Reiner excitedly

"Don't tell me you're pregnant" Marcel raised an eyebrow

"Wha- no!" I rolled my eyes at my younger brother and continued, "Guess who's big sister got the Jaw" I pointed at the red armband resting on my left sleeve.

"Really?!" Porco's mouth hung open, amazed.

"That means both of you get to be honorary Marleyans" I threw my arms around them once more and tackled them to the floor.

"Where is mom?" I asked them

"She's out in the market place" Marcel responded

"..And dad?"

Both boys raised an eyebrow at my question, uncertain why I even asked in the first place.

"He was drinking again, mom and Porco had it rough last night"

"Oh." I said

Quite frankly, I actually had no intent to tell or even talk to my father. That asshole does not deserve my attention whatsoever. However, it has become a habit for me to ask my younger brothers about dad. Not to see how he is doing, but to see how my mother and brothers are doing. I know they would never explicitly tell me what is happening to them.

"Me and Reiner are gonna get going. You guys and mom are going to get your honorary Marleyan armbands next week. Tell mom the news for me, I'm probably gonna sleep over at Reiner's place today" I patted both of their heads and kissed their cheek as they waved me and Reiner off.

"Where do you want to celebrate?" He asked

"Let's go get dinner first. Does your mom know?"

"...No. You're the first person i told"

"Oh you just got it right?"

"Yea."

"Do you want to invite your mom to dinner with us?"

"Gah.. let's go to dinner alone, it'll be like a date" Reiner rubbed the back of his neck

"Okay, we can tell her later then"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I looked up at my ceiling, my arms holding a crinkled paper with scribbles and words all throughout the paper.

"This is so confusing" I mumbled

"I agree," Reiner, whose head was resting on my stomach, answered.

"What does yours look like?" I looked down at my thighs and stomach where Reiner was

"I don't even know, a bunch of scribbles, the word armor here and there, it doesn't make sense." He lifted up his arm and handed me the piece of paper

"I don't understand how we are supposed to go to that island of devils in 2 weeks when not even we understand the plan" Reiner placed his hands on my thighs and sighed.

"Have you asked Annie or Bertholdt?" I looked at the piece of paper he handed me

"Bertholdt doesn't understand either and Annie...." Rainer paused "She probably understands but she won't tell us"

"Annie is a bitch sometimes" I huffed and threw my arms to my sides.

"I second that statement" Reiner lifted himself off his bed and sat down next to me.

"We'll just ask General Magath tomorrow at training."

"They'll confiscate our titan abilities if we don't understand this" I giggle slightly

"You're right. We'll just ask Zeke or Pieck about it" Reiner leaned on to my shoulder and closed his eyes

"Are you tired?" I lifted a stand of his blond hair out of his face.

"A little bit" He whispered into my neck

"Oh come on it's so early!" I pinched his nose to try and wake him up

"Mar" He groaned as he pushed my hand away from his face

"Look at the time" I pointed at the clock that sat slightly crooked against the worn and old wall.

"Dont care." His arms snaked down to my waist and he pulled me into a hug

"Reiner let go I'm not gonna sleep yet" I tried to push him away, but his muscular arms are so damn strong.

"Yes you are" I felt him smile against my neck

"Fuck you." I rubbed his hair gently and accepted defeat. In all honesty, I enjoyed cuddling with Reiner, I just didn't want to give him that satisfaction.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Marlene!" A familiar black haired girl

"Pieck" I smiled at the older girl as I made my way down the street.

"Join us at the bar tonight. You just turned 18, we need one last celebration before you, Reiner, Annie, and Bertholdt leave for Paradis"

"I will!" I smiled

"How are you and Reiner?" Pieck stood next to me and began walking with me

"We've been good. Our two year anniversary was 1 month ago"

"That's amazing! You guys have been best friends and then a couple while in the warrior program" Pieck eyed my red arm band.

"Yea," I smiled a little, remembering the blond boy I fell in love with 2 years ago.

"Do you want to go right now? I heard Reiner already went with Bertholdt" Pieck faced me

That's a little strange, Reiner would usually tell me or bring me anywhere he was going. I might as well join Pieck if he is already there.

"I'll join you" I nodded as I let Pieck lead me to the bar.

**(*)**

Me and Pieck arrived at the bar as the sun started setting, the golden honey like glow shone through the windows of the establishment. Pieck pushed open the doors as we entered the crowded bar. Looking through the crowd, I searched for Reiner. He wasn't to be seen anywhere. Where could he have gone?

"I'm gonna go look for Reiner" I said to Pieck, raising my voice since the bar was loud and noisy.

"Okay! I'm gonna go find Zeke" Pieck waved me off as I searched for Reiner.

Reiner was nowhere to be seen, though I managed to spot Annie.

"Hey Annie!" I waved at her

"Hey."

"Where is Reiner and Ber-"

Just then, a tall raven haired boy entered the room.

"Bertholdt?" I raised an eyebrow

"Hi Marlene!" He smiled at me as he handed Annie her drink

"Where is Reiner?"

"He's not with you? Reiner said he was gonna go to the bar with you."

"Pieck told me he went to the bar with you?" I pointed at Bertholdt.

"What? no. I came with Annie"

What is going on. Where is Reiner.

"I'll go look for him" I frowned slightly before looking around the room again.

I spotted a brown door, guessing it was another room for the bar. I twisted the golden door knob and entered the room. There were definitely people here, I don't think I see Reiner though. While scanning around the room, my body stiffened, my heart sank, my hands began trembling.

My eyes widened as I saw the familiar blond boy, the boy I fell in love with, the boy that was my world, the boy I thought would never do this to me.

My face contorted into an expression of shock and pain, as I looked at my loved ones lips locked against someone else's. It felt like a dagger had just been pressed into my chest, feeling unable to breathe.

Reiner looked up, and saw me, standing by the doorway. He pushed the brown haired woman back and immediately stood up, looking at me.

"Mar.."

At this point, I felt like passing out. It was all too sudden.

I slammed the door shut and ran outside of the bar. Tears straining my eyes.

"Marlene wait!" Reiner shouted.

As I left the bar, I tried to run. Someone took hold of my hand and pulled me back, I immediately knew who this hand belonged to.

"Why.." I whispered

"Mar, I can explain.."

"You want to explain to me why the fuck you were making out with someone else?" I pushed his hand away and looked up at him, the tears that lay in my eyes started flowing.

"It's not what you think!"

"You tell me Reiner. I know for a fact you are not drunk because you handle alcohol well. Did our two years together mean nothing to you?!" I started raising my voice, realizing how angry I am.

"It was-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT REINER. YOU JUST BROKE MY HEART AND THREW OUR TWO YEARS TOGETHER DOWN THE DRAIN. I LOVED YOU." I took the small silver ring Reiner had gifted to me for our anniversary and threw it at his face.

"Marlene please! I am so sorry."

"No." I clenched my fist and turned around.

"You just hurt me in a way you can't even imagine. I hope I never see you again. I don't want to speak to you again. Fuck you. I will never love you again."

I turned back towards him. Ripped off the locket that lay around my neck, and threw it to the ground.

"Mar!" Reiner fell to his knees, pleading for my forgiveness.

"You should have thought about what would happen if you betrayed my trust Reiner. Fuck you" I turned back around, and walked alone throughout the street. When I was out of sight, I fell to my knees, and began crying. I sat down in a dark alleyway and thought about the events that just happened a couple of minutes ago. I thought I made the right choice by breaking the locket and ring.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_I thought if I could hurt him like he had hurt me, I would feel avenged. I don't. Instead, I feel vindictive and mean._ **_I feel like I'm my father._ **   
  
  
  
  
  


_word count: 2253_


	7. [6] meeting

♪ Animal - Sir Chloe

~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~

chapter 6: meeting

Hanji, Levi, and I burst through the wooden doors that led to the conference room.

"Speak of the devil" Arlo leaned back into his chair and smirked at us.

"We were just talking about you 3, I'm glad you could make it." Erwin nodded his head and signaled to the empty chairs in the conference room. I scanned the room, searching for my nameplate. Finally, I spotted a metal object with the words, " _Capt. Galliard"_ neatly carved into the plate.

I took a seat next to Arlo and Jozef.

"Where were you captain?" Jozef asked as I took off my cape and folded it on to my lap.

"I went outside headquarters for a couple of hours to catch some fresh air." I leaned back against my chair and lifted my legs onto the desk.

"Ever heard of manners, Marlene?" Levi eyed my legs that were resting on top of the table

"Ever learned to shut the fuck up, Levi?" I pushed my legs off the table and sat up straight.

Erwin cleared his throat, stopping me and Levi's potential argument and pulled out 2 stacks of folders.

"Today's meeting is very important." He rubbed his light green amulet that rested on his neck and continued, "We are discussing the 57th exterior expedition that will take place one month from today."

"Sounds great," Arlo nodded

"Is Eren Yeager here?" Erwin asked Hanji, who was seated next to him.

"Er.. no. Do you want me to go find him?" Hanji looked at the clipboard of present scout members.

"It's fine, we can have someone explain the plan to him since he isn't that important today."

"So, what are we gonna do on this expedition?" I asked Erwin.

"For this expedition, we are looking to plan a new course from Calaneth district to Shiganshina district."

"Great, another suicide mission?" Levi asked

"Will you shut the fuck up for once in your life?" I looked at him as he sat across the opposite table from me.

"Look whos talking" He replied

"I know when to shut the fuck up, unlike yo-"

"Enough." Erwin stood up and hit his hand against the desk making me jolt back into my seat.

"Tch" Levi mumbled under his breath

"As I was saying, we are going to find a path to Shiganshina district. With Yeager's abilities, we can possibly retake wall Maria earlier than anticipated." Erwin nodded at Jozef as he stood up and began handing out faded, worn, pieces of light brown paper throughout the room.

I picked the piece of paper that was laid on my table, my eyes widened. It was the same paper Reiner showed me earlier, except the positions and orientations were slightly altered. Was his map incorrect?

"Currently," Erwin stood up and walked to the blackboard, "All scouts that are involved in this mission, not just the ones from our headquarters, are having this exact meeting. No matter our different headquarters, we know how the plan works.

"You will know what position you are in, since that position is circled and has your name written on it." He picked up a piece of chalk, and started drawing a copy of the plan.

I looked around the paper for my name,

**"** **_Capt. Galliard, Capt. Levi. Galliard/Levi squad."_ **

"What the hell is this shit?" Levi looked up from the paper and stared at Erwin.

"What part are you confused about, is your name not there?" Erwin turned and faced Levi

"No. Why the hell does it say Galliard/Levi squad?" Levi scoffed

"Oh, right." Erwin let go of the chalk he was holding, a thin layer of white powder coating his fingers. He tapped his hand lightly, removing the excess chalk that remained.

"For this mission, it is crucial that Both you and Marlene are working together."

"Why?"

"Both of you are the strongest soldiers in all of the survey corps." He adjusted his green amulet and continued, "Naturally, we want the two strongest soldiers protecting the person who has the possibility of freeing humanity."

Me and Levi both exchanged quick glances before sighing and looking away.

"Captain Galliard and Levi's squads are going to be conjoined for this mission. Meaning, both Y/N and Levi are in charge. Please work together, don't argue, and come up with plans and agreements together."

Me and Levi fight a lot. Well, I wouldn't call it a full on fistfight but you know where I'm going with this. A prettier word; we _argue.._ a lot.

"Same goes for people under their command." Erwin looked at Levi's squad, more specifically, Oluo.

"Yea, because Oluo has a severe superiority complex. If he disrespects my soldiers and squad, Levi, yo-"

"Shut up. You just disrespected _my_ soldier."

"Yea because Oluo is always disrespectful to my soldiers and he thinks he is above everyone. Oluo is arrogant."

Levi snapped the pencil he was holding in half, looking up at me with a cold stare.

"I said enough!" Erwin shouted. "Look at you two, humanities strongest and you act like this in front of your own soldiers. I think it's best if you two leave the meeting."

My mouth hung agape, never in my five years of being in the survey corps has Erwin ever yelled like this.

"We'll stop arguing." Levi set down the broken pencil

Erwin sighed as he rubbed his temple, "Alright, but if you two insult each other or argue _one_ more time, you WILL leave the meeting."

"Yes Erwin" I looked down and ran my hand through my hair.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see both Arlo and Jozef staring at me in dismay.

"Stop staring at me." I looked up and returned their stare, as they immediately avoided my eye contact.

~~~~~~~~~

"This is all pretty self explanatory, does everyone understand their roles, signals, orientations, and operations?" Hanji looked around the room.

"Okay, if not, then this meeting is hereby dismissed. Please come back every week for slight alterations and changes to the plan. Keep the maps we handed out and don't forget to train."

She clapped her hands together as two guards opened the conference room doors. Slowly, everyone stood up and walked out of the room. As I followed behind Arlo, someone grabbed my arm and pulled me back from the crowd.

"What-"

"Follow me to my office." Levi said

"Why?" I looked at him.

"We need to talk about our conjoined group. I know for a fact that if we walk in there blindly without consulting each other one on one, we, or our comrades will die." He said in a rather serious tone.

I pulled my arm away from his grip,

"Okay..let's make it quick though, I need to begin my training." I nodded as I followed him to his office.

Levi opened his office door and held out his arm for me to enter. I walked past him and sat down in front of his desk. Wow. His office is definitely cleaner than mine.

"Okay, I just.." He sat down across from me and adjusted his neck cloth, "I want us to stop arguing over everything. It doesn't help us or our team members."

"That's easier said than done." I sighed

"Just tell me what you think of the plan and some strategies you have in mind. Then I'll say my strategies too."

"Hm. Sure" I shrugged lightly as I pulled out the piece of paper from my pocket. "This is where Erwin placed our group, it's the safest area in the whole formation. I don't feel like we need too many strategies but I have a couple in mind just in case." As I shared my strategies and opinions, I saw Levi staring at me. His tense body relaxed, his eyes softened, and he just.. stared.

-

"That's what I think our best strategy is." I looked up at him. He continued to stare at me. "Uh.. Levi?" I waved my hand in front of his face to catch his attention.

"Oh, what?" He suddenly broke eye contact and looked away.

"My strategies, what do you think of them?"

"Oh." He cleared his throat, "y-yea I think those are good strategies. We can talk about them more with Erwin and Hanji tomorrow."

"Don't you want to share your strategies now?" I raised an eyebrow.

"No. We'll talk about it tomorrow." He picked up his pen and began filling out paperwork as he pointed to the office door.

"Uh, okay." I furrowed my eyebrows slightly and exited quietly.

"Hey Mar!" Hange hummed next to my ear

"Gah! Hanji.." I slapped the back of her head

"We're gonna start training today." Hanji nodded

"Okay, I just need to go put some stuff away, I'll meet you in the training grounds"

"Whatever you say captain Galliard." Hanji grinned at me and left the corridor.

I walked back back to my office and locked the door, I pulled out a letter from inside my tucked shirt and stared at the bright red wax seal on the letter. I sat down on my desk and quickly pulled out a pen, scribbling down some words on the envelope. My hands raised the envelope up to my eyes, as I read the incoherent words. Frankly, these words were no mistake. They were not incoherent. In fact, this is just another form of writing Eldian. I put the envelope down and slid it under my shirt, it's time to find the nearest mailbox.

Grabbing my cape to better conceal the letter, I unlocked my office door, walked out, and made my way to the training grounds to find Hanji.

**_30 days until the 57th exterior scouting expedition_ ** _._

_word count: 1644_


	8. [7] not you.

♪ help herself - bbno$, diamond pistols

~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~

chapter 7: not you.  
 **TW: Brief mention of rape and assault.**  
  


"Oh fuck no" Hanji laughed as she reached her arm up to me. I grabbed her arm and pulled her back up.

"You were the one that wanted to train in the first place." I laughed along with her

"I didn't think you were gonna be this powerful" Hanji admitted

"It's been like 2 years since we trained together, was I too easy last time?" I teased her

"No! I mean.." Hanji raised her eyebrow

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, "Oh fuck you"

"I don't want to sugar coat it Mar!" Hanji swung my arm around.

"Mhm, yea sure."

We walked to the edge of the training grounds, and rested our backs on a wooden fence.

"We should probably take a break from all this training." Hanji rested her head on my shoulder

"I don't know, there's like 15 more days before our expedition. We should probably get as much training in as we can." I flicked her forehead with my middle finger

"Mar, I would much rather continue my titan experiments with Eren and abnormals than train."

I stared at her for a couple of seconds and then sighed, "Levi was right."

"Hm?" she responded

"Hanji, you are a titan romantic."

Hanji's mouth hung open, "Well that was random." she laughed it off.

"No no, I mean it. You ARE a titan romantic." I pushed her head off my shoulder

"What the hell, you actually mean it?" Hanji punched my stomach lightly.

I held in my laughter, "Yea"

Hanji rolled her eyes and looked around watching other scouts training. I also looked back to the training grounds, watching the cadet's fight each other.

"That Mikasa girl is really strong" I stared at the raven haired girl, amazed at her incredible strength and durability.

"I know right." Hanji looked at the girl as she effortlessly beat Eren to the floor.

"Ouch" I cringed at the sight

"Yikes"

"Look! The scouts are training right now!" A high pitched voice called out.

Both me and Hanji turned our heads in the direction of the voice. A group of young teenagers stared excitedly at us. Behind them, I saw a familiar bald man. The man I met 6 years ago, Keith Sadies. I tapped Hanji's shoulder and pointed at my former commandant. Hanji looked at the group of kids and excitedly stood up, pulling me up by force.

"Keith!" Hanji waved at the man excitedly.

"Section Commander" Keith nodded his head at Hanji and then faced me.

"Galliard" He reached his hand out to me

"Good to see you Keith" I took hold of his hand and shook it.

"Captain!" Someone tapped my shoulder.

I turned around and raised an eyebrow at Eren.  
"What is it Eren?"

"Sasha bit Jean on accident and he's bleeding"

I stared at Eren for a couple of seconds, "What the-" I peeked over his shoulder and amusingly, I saw Sasha and Connie, bowing down on Jean and yelling their apologies.

"Uhm.." 

My question is, how does one accidentally bite someone? 

"Just take Jean to the infirmary or take a break" I patted his shoulder and turned back to Keith, a shocked expression on his face.

I frowned a little and spoke, "Sorry, these new cadet's are a bit strange." I chuckled

"Did he say captain?" Keith interrupted

"What?"

"Did Yeager call you captain?"

"Oh yea. I guess I never told you, it's captain Galliard now" I smiled

"Wow, that was fast." Keith chuckled

"Who are these people Keith?" Hanji looked at the group of kids curiously.

"These are the 105th cadet corps" Keith presented the kids to me and Hanji

"Nice to meet everyone." I waved at them.

"Cadets, this is Section Commander Hanji, and Captain Galliard." Keith called out to the cadets

All cadets immediately saluted and nodded their heads at me and Hanji.

"What brings you here, Keith?" I asked

"I don't know if you remember, but at the beginning of every cadet group we take them to a regiment headquarters so they see how a certain regiment trains and lives. This year we chose these headquarters for the scout regiment."

"Hmm." Hanji smiled at all the cadets

"Well that's great, I hope you kids enjoy your tour at these headquarters." A made eye contact with a brown haired girl, she had beautiful teal eyes and freckles covering most of her face. Her eyes stared curiously at my light brown eyes.

"Cadets, it's time to move on. Say your goodbyes to the section commander and captain" Keith said

I looked at the girl, she seemed interesting. It wasn't long before all the cadets waved at us and moved on, following behind Keith. I didn't get the girl's name. I wonder if I'll ever see her again.

"Mar, do you want to continue our training?" Hanji turned to me as soon as Keith left.

"I thought you said you'd rather be doing titan experiments?" I placed my hands on my hips.

"Changed my mind." She grinned

"You're too easy though." I hummed

Hanji frowned and looked around the training grounds, looking for someone. Hanji spotted something and gasped.

"What is it?" I looked behind her shoulder

"You should fight Levi. I want to see you beat him" She giggled

"Easy." I rolled my eyes

"Then do it."

"Okay I will do it" I nodded

I walked across the training grounds, Hanji excitedly following behind me. As I walked up to the small midget and reached my arm across from him.

"What do you want?" Levi said without looking up at me.

"I want to fight you, captain." I said

Levi paused, and looked up at me "You want to fight?"

"Yea, Hanji said I probably couldn't beat you in a fight, but I know I can." I yawned

"..Really?" Levi raised an eyebrow. Great, I have piqued his curiosity.

"Mhm."

"I'll fight you then." Levi stood up from the stool and walked to the middle of the training grounds

"Woah, calm down there captain. You don't want to get filthy do you?" I patted the dirt ground with my boot.

Levi ignored my question and got ready to fight. I raised my arms and stared at him.

"Begin!" Hanji yelled.

Levi walked up to me, taking the first swing, which I easily dodged. We continued on like this, with small swings and dodges, slowly escalating and getting more aggressive, our rhythm in sync with each punch and block. Levi let his guard down for a split second, giving me enough time to tackle him to the ground. Levi, shocked at the sudden action, stumbled backwards and hit the hard dirt floor. I pinned one of his ankles to the floor with my knee, as my arms pinned his wrists above his head.

"Who's in control now, captain?" I smirked at him

Levi let out a low chuckle, so low only I could hear it. With his free leg, Levi lifted his leg above my waist and pushed me aside, making me flip over, as he now hovered above me. He bent down next to me, our faces inches apart, and whispered,

"Not you."

Those two words sent shivers down my spine.

As I lay under Levi, defenseless, unable to move, I thought back about that moment 6 years ago. _His arm pinning me on to the floor, his hand covering my muffled cries for help._

"STOP!" I yelled as I tried to free myself from Levi's grip. He noticed my change and immediately let go of me. I pushed him away from me. He looked at me in shock, as my eyes widened after what just happened.

"Marlene!" Hanji crouched down next to me and caressed my face, "What the fuck did you do Levi?!"

Hanji stood up and began walking towards Levi. I reached my hand out and gripped on to her cape.

"He didn't do anything, I'm fine Hanji." I pulled her back towards me.

"You don't need to lie, Mar. I know this asshole did something." Hanji hissed at Levi

"He didn't, I'm fine." I grabbed on to her shoulder and pulled myself back up. I patted the dust off my pants, "It's okay Hanji, I still won right? I was in control most of the time." I winked at Levi

Hanji looked at me in a concerned manner, she's not buying it. "Yea, you won Marlene."

"What?! That's bullshit." Levi spoke up

"How so captain?" I rolled my eyes at him

"You were the one that stopped the fight. I had you pinned on the floor an-"

"Enough. Mar won, shut up and accept defeat Levi." Hanji cut him off

"Tch" Levi ran his hand through his hair and walked past me.

Hanji stared as Levi walked past both of us and then turned to me, "Marlene."

"Hm?"

"What actually happened."

The question made me freeze

"It's..nothing" I smiled

"Stop lying. I know when you lie. Did he do something to you?" Hanji eyed the short male in the distance.

"No Levi didn't do anything to me. I.." I hesitated, even Hanji, my closest friend, didn't know. Not that I could tell her of course, she isn't even supposed to be my friend. What would I say? 

_'Hanji dear, a Marleyan soldier impregnated me for science but of course you don't know what Marley is because you think there is no life outside the walls.'_

"A couple years ago, someone assaulted me. Being pinned on the floor, defenseless just reminded me of that moment. Truth be told... I was scared."

Hanji stared at me, in shock. Her eyes softened, as she walked up to me and wrapped her arms around me.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so insistent."

"Hanji.." I hugged her back tightly, "thank you, it feels good telling someone I trust."

Hanji kissed the top of my head, and looked at me, "Thank you for telling me Mar, if you ever need me I'll always be here for you. After all, it's what bestfriends do, right ?" She winked

I laughed at her, "you're so cheesy Hanji."

"I know I am," she patted my head  
  
  


**_15 days until the 57th exterior scout mission._ **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**note: the 'marleyan soldier' is NOT Reiner. Everything that happened between Marlene and Reiner was consensual. This is just a man who abused her.

word count: 1761


	9. [8] beyond the walls

♪ ilomilo - billie eilish

~~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 8: beyond the walls

I stumbled back, my hook just barely latching on to the tree in time. My arms wrapped tightly around the rope as I pulled myself up and on to the ledge.

"Captain! Are you alright?" Jozef propelled himself towards my tree.

"I'm fine." I gripped onto Jozef's shoulder and pulled myself back on my feet. "Where's the rest of our squad?"

"Captain Levi is down there with the rest of the squad" He pointed at the group of horses galloping in the distance.

"We need to go then." I removed my hook from the tree and jumped down, Jozef following close behind me.

I jumped on to the vacant horse that was following the group and turned to Levi, "What happened while I was gone?"

"We were notified that a 14 metre abnormal was spotted. The titan was strange too, it had female features."

I flinched at Levi's remark, it has begun.

"The most important thing to do right now is to keep Yeager safe, make sure he does not leave the middle of the group." I looked behind me, making sure Eren stayed in between Petra and Oluo.

"That's their job not ours." Levi glanced behind his shoulder and continued.

"Are you kidding me?"

"Our job is to reach Shiganshina."

"To retake Shiganshina, we need to have Eren safe."

"Stop fighting!" Jozef caught up next to me and faced both me and Levi.

"We're not fighting Jozef" I sternly responded

"Yea, we are having a civilized argument." Levi added

"Argument or not you guys need to work together for our squad to function"

"Save all the sappy shit for later Jozef" Levi spat

"Hey, don't talk to him like that" I sneered

"Whatever."

"Jozef, retreat back and protect Eren."

"Yes ma'am" Jozef steered his horse into the back of the group

"You should stop being such an ass, captain." I looked back at Levi

"Forget about this and focus on the mission. Avoid that abnormal titan at all costs." He replied

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Me and Levi's squad galloped through the thick oak woods.

"We're almost there!" I shouted

After what seemed like days, countless deaths, blood, sweat, and tears, there was a spark of joy. A small spark that would mean victory for this mission.

Of course, good things, _hope_ , don't last forever. Shortly after my single thought that was somewhat optimistic, the ground began trembling.

"WHAT IS THAT?" Eld shouted from behind

Levi peeked over his shoulder, his eyes widened.

"The female abnormal is right behind us." He said calmly

"What?" I looked back and saw the 14 metre titan, no, _Annie_ , running directly behind us. We were only ahead of her by a couple of metres.

"Stay calm." Levi glanced at me

Petra looked back at Annie, as she slowly came closer. Suddenly, 4 people used their odm gear to attack Annie from behind. Two of them latched onto her legs, while another one latched onto her arm, and the final person headed for the nape. Annie covered her nape and did not stop running, easily kicking off the two people on her legs.

"We need to help them!" Eren yelled

"They're already dead." Levi responded

I gritted my teeth, trying to hold back from yelling at the insensitive comment. I stopped, I realized, this is my fault. It is my fault my comrades are dying. I'm terrible, I'm a hypocrite. I couldn't believe myself, betraying everyone I had grown attached to, I'm a traitor.

Levi snapped me out of my trance, "Oi. I'm gonna go ahead, you stay here with our squad"

"Okay" I nodded

Levi quickly galloped away, leaving me alone with our squad.

"What's the plan, Captain?" Petra shouted

"Just keep going, we are nearing the end of the forest" I bit my lip. As much as I wanted to protect my squad, as part of my role as captain, I also had to let Annie get a hold of Eren. I can't do both, i've got to choose one.

As I the sound of soldiers screaming filled my ears, hearing the movement of Annie as she viciously killed them off one by one, tears strained my eyes. I felt helpless.

Annie tailed us, inching closer and closer to my group. I looked over my shoulder, locking eye contact for a brief second. Suddenly, Petra, Oluo, and Eld fell back from the group and jumped off their horses, propelling themselves from the trees.

"What the fuck! Come back!" I yelled

"You go get away with Eren, Captain! We need to keep him safe, even if it means we get to accept the consequences." Petra shouted

I hesitated for a moment, before pulling the reins of Eren's horse and galloping ahead.

"I'm trusting you. Don't die on me you bastards." I whispered

I heard the shouting of the Levi squad fighting Annie. A noise so painful, I wanted to rip my ears off, shut off, and wait until all this massacring is over.

"Eren." I turned behind me, with wide, fearful eyes, I spoke, "Get out of the forest. I'll assist the Levi squad"

"But Captain!"

"Shut up and follow my orders! Trust us. We can't let you die on us." I pulled the reins of his horse forward and pushed him away

"We'll meet you outside" I shouted

I turned my horse around, and began charging towards the squad, who currently had Annie on a tree, fallen, unable to move. I underestimated them. Just as they were about to slice her nape, Annie opened one of her thought to be blinded eyes, and bit Eld in half.

"ELD!" Petra screamed

I halted my horse, and stood frozen, breathing heavily, my hands gripped on to my blades.

I used my odm gear to fly through the forest, reaching the titan as soon as possible. I made eye contact with Annie once again. My face contorted into an expression of anger and rage. Annie charged towards Petra. I screamed. Tears spilling out of my eyes, I charged forward as fast as I could, pushing Petra out of the female's path. I looked up at Annie, who was about to kill me, her eyes widened, just as she was about to kill one of her own. Suddenly, I felt a huge amount of force on my back, two hands pushed me out of Annie's way. I turned back around and faced the person who had just saved my life, it was Jozef.

"Jozef!" I shouted

"Thank you for everything, Marlene." Jozef smiled weakly at me as tears rolled down his flushed cheeks.

I reached my hand out, one last attempt to reach him.

It was too late.

In a blink of an eye, Annie kicked Jozef into the tree, killing him instantly.

"JOZEF!" I screamed as I fell to the floor

Annie faced a struggling Petra, who had still not regained her composure. The female ran forward, running throughout the forest as Petra desperately tried to get away. Annie swiftly stepped on Petra. Effortlessly. With no hesitation. With no regrets.

"You bitch!" Oluo yelled. 

He charged forward, trying to once again slice her nape open. Of course, Annie hardened her nape. Breaking Oluo's blades immediately. His breath hitched, and without a second to spare, Annie kicked him into the woods. Assuming he is now dead. Annie's titan turned back to face me, as I lay on my knees, on the grassy, blood stained floor. My eyes wide, shaky breath, and terrified expression. Annie ignored me, and turned back around. I fell forward. My elbows on the floor, my hands gripping on to my hair. I let out a shaky laugh which contorted into a scream. Tears rolling down my face, I cried and screamed as loud as I could. I dug my fingernails into my scalp as I kept screaming and hitting my fist against the floor.

Two feet landed next to me,

"Jesus Christ, what the hell happened?!" A familiar voice yelled.

I looked up at Levi, I bit my lip as even more tears began falling from my face. Without thinking, I stood up from the floor, and threw my arms around him. Levi's eyes widened, and he looked at my shaking body, as I continued crying into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, "I couldn't save them"

Levi realized what I meant. His squad is dead, and it's all my fault.

He pushed me away from him, and looked at me.

"We need to go now."

"What about the mission?" I said, my voice still shaky.

"We failed. Erwin ordered a full retreat."

I looked down at the floor and closed my eyes, trying to regain my composure.

"Hey look, it's not your fault." He spoke softly

"It is my fault."

"It's okay." He said, "Let's get out of here before the abnormal comes back."

"Ok."

"Does your gear work?" he asked

"I think so." I said

"Let's go then"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Marlene!" Hanji looked around the crowd of soldiers, desperately scanning everyone for my face.

"Hanji!" I yelled as I left the outskirts of the forest.

"Marlene!" She yelled as she ran towards me, tackling me to the ground.

"You're alive!" I said

"You're alive! She said

She hugged me tightly, refusing to let go.

"H-hanji.. I..I c-cant b-breathe" I gasped for air trying to loosen the grip of her arms.

"Right. Sorry" She let go and grinned cheekily.

"Thank you for being by my side" I said

"Of course. What happened?" She pushed a strand of hair out of my face, concerned at my sudden change of mood.

"I.. Me and Levi's squad died. It's my fault."

"Mar.."

"Don't do that" I said

"Do what?"

"Say it's not my fault. Don't do that. Levi already said that, it doesn't help. It was my fault. My soldiers died because of me." I buried my face into my hands. I'm so close to breaking. I'm so close to telling the truth.

"Marlene, you tried to save them right? It's not your fault."

"You don't understand Hanji!" I raised my voice at her.

"Sorry." I said

"I'm sorry." she placed her hand on my back leaned into my shoulder.

**_We failed the 57th exterior expedition, and it is all my fault._ **

_word count: 1658_

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

note: ** A small detail I added was Jozef's final words being Marlene. I found it interesting because Jozef always called her "Captain Galliard" until his last moments, similar to Moblit. Jozef had a small one sided crush on Marlene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ** A small detail I added was Jozef's final words being Y/N. I found it interesting because Jozef always called Y/N "Captain Galliard" until his last moments, similar to Moblit. Jozef has a small one sided crush on Y/N.


	10. [9] melancholy.

♪ K. - Cigarettes After Sex

~~~~~~~~꧁꧂~~~~~~~~

chapter 9: melancholy.

The scouts entered the gates of wall Rose, our heads down, walking in shame.

"Are those the scouts?"

"Didn't they leave today?"

"They failed their mission?"

"They're so useless."

"They lost so many soldiers for nothing!"

"The survey corps are a disgrace to the walls."

Everyone spoke. Talking shit about the survey corps, as if we aren't already suffering enough.

I had my arm secured around Arlo's waist, as he limped alongside me. All the soldiers that surrounded me were injured, bleeding, about to die. I looked around watching all my comrades, I felt sorry for them.

I got the courage to look up. Immediately, faces made eye contact with me, and they wore an unpleasant, disgusted look.

As we walked back, I made eye contact with a sandy haired boy. He stood on wooden crates, a bright smile on his face as he watched us walk throughout the city. I smiled weakly at him, waving slightly. The boy enthusiastically waved back, clearly mesmerized by the Survey Corps. Hopefully, he doesn't have to go through this hell.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The wooden doors of the headquarters burst open, soldiers that had minimal to no injuries at all immediately returned to their respective headquarters. The injured and wounded stayed behind to get treated in the city. The mood throughout the room was dark, gloomy, and grim. Who could blame them though, preparing a mission for so long, then to have it all turn into shit not even a day later. So many lost soldiers, fallen comrades, Jozef. It was all my fault.

"Marlene" Hanji said

"Hm?" I turned around and faced her

"Go get cleaned up and then come back to eat with me" she said

"Why are you so bossy all of a sudden?" I chuckled

"Because you aren't taking care of yourself and I don't like that." Hanji said

"Okay fine." I rolled my eyes and pushed her head away

"Don't forget, Marlene." Hanji slapped my back and walked off to sit with Arlo.

I walked down the familiar stone hallway and into my office. I sat down on my office chair, took off my cape, and inhaled the scent of my room, it smelled like dust, faint scent of flowers, and.. _tea?_

I furrowed my eyes slightly, I don't drink tea. I walked around my office, and wondered, why does my office smell like tea?

-

As I exited my office, wearing a new, clean, pair of uniform, I turned right, heading for the cafeteria. I walked past a familiar door, the same door I walk by every day, his office, Levi's office.

Suddenly, a muffled noise came from inside his room. I stopped right in front of his door, and pressed my ear against it, whilst placing my hand on the knob.

I heard a soft, muffled, inaudible noise. Was he talking to someone? What was he doing in there?

I knocked on the door, concerned, and quite frankly, curious. "Hey Levi, are you ok?" I spoke

No response.

This is strange. I twisted the golden door knob, the door of his office creaking open as I peered inside. Levi, sat on his office chair, looking at the ground, mumbling something I could not hear. I closed the door behind me and walked up to his desk, and tapped the palm of my hand against it.

"Levi" I waved my hands in front of his face, but he ignored me. Was he sick again? I walked over to the side of his desk, I gasped.

He leaned over an open desk drawer, the drawer, to my horror, was _stuffed_ to the brim with survey corps patches. I kneeled down in front of him, looking at the drawer, then back at Levi, only then did I notice the silent tears rolling down his face, his right hand gripping on to another patch.

"Levi.." I spoke softly, my eyes began to water, I placed my hand on top of his trembling hand, trying to calm him down.

Without warning, he leaned forward, pulling me into a hug, not saying a word. I rubbed small circles on his back, as he gripped on to my body, burying his face into my shoulder. Tears stained my jacket, as small muffled sobs rang throughout the room.

I took a deep breath in, I have never seen him in such an emotional state, it hurt seeing him like this. I continued comforting him, as tears pooled and threatened to leave my eyes.

"Let it out." I whispered

It felt strange, comforting your rival. The person you are supposed to hate, but you don't. The person you are supposed to compete against, but instead you comfort him. Such an intimate moment, shared by the two Survey Corps captains, who are supposed to, announced as, and sworn to be enemies, rivals, foes. Well, I guess we don't exactly abide by the rules, do we?

At this point, Levi had left his chair, and sat down on the floor, where I was. We sat on the floor, our arms wrapped around one another, as I stroked his hair gently, and he cried into my shoulder.

I knew Levi, but I didn't know him at all.

These last 5 years spent together, thinking he was an angry, sarcastic son of a bitch who cared for no one. One day though, everything changes when he removes his mask and shows you his true self, his emotional side, it was more powerful than I would have guessed.

He calmed down, his body stopped trembling, I heard small sniffles as he leaned into my shoulder, his arms still around me.

He mumbled something.

"What?" I asked

"Nevermind." He said

I stayed quiet, before finally deciding to pull away from him, though I didn't want to. I hate to admit it, especially in this situation, but his body, no, his warmth. His warmth made me feel different. Though I sound like an asshole, his warmth made me, well, happy. I stared into his red, swollen, puffy eyes. A sight I never thought I would see. He exhaled softly through his mouth, and let go of me. Stood up, closed the drawer, and sat back down in his office chair. I guess he has gone back to his usual self.

I gripped onto my knee and stood up, he was already making himself busy with paperwork, he pretended like nothing happened, like nothing's changed.

Though everything changed.

"I'm gonna stop by the cafeteria and grab something to eat, Hanji and Arlo are waiting for me." I said, "Do you want to come?"

"I'm fine." He mumbled

"What did you eat today?" I raised an eyebrow

"Nothing yet. I'm fine, you don't need to worry about me."

"I'll bring you something." I nodded

"No."

"Yes." I grabbed his chin with my index finger, and pulled his head up to look at me, "I'll bring you something." I let go, crossing my arms, and smiling at him.

He looked up at me, his facial features relaxed, soft, he didn't look angry or annoyed.

"I'll take that as a yes."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Marlene!" Arlo waved his hands as I took a seat next to Hanji.

"Hello"

"Where were you Mar?" Hanji asked

"I was in my office"

"Oh." she stared into my eyes, searching for a lie.

"Stop staring at me like that." I pushed her face away from me with my hand

"Hey Marlene" Arlo said, with his mouth stuffed with food.

"Close your mouth when eating Arlo." I said, sipping onto my drink

"Ugh," Arlo continued, "Anyway, do you want to come outside with me and Hanji for a smoke later?"

I scoffed and looked at him, "Arlo, you know I don't smoke."

"Eh, worth a try." He smirked

"Mar." Hanji tapped my shoulder enthusiastically.

"Yes Hanji" I replied

"Me and Arlo have good news." She giggled

"And what's that?"

"In order to lift the spirits of the Survey Corps, we are going to host a ball for all the survey corps members!" She clapped her hands together, as I nearly spat out my water.

"You're gonna host a what?!" I said

"A ball!" Hanji responded.

_word count: 1393_


End file.
